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Matthew Draws/Readers Draw – The Results

by | Oct 31, 2014 | Matthew Draws | 1 comment

All right, folks. We’ve given you two full weeks to ponder and vote, and now it’s time to announce the winner of the first-and-last-ever Matthew Draws Readers Draw contest.

To remind you, here are the four celebrities we invited Idiots’Books subscribers to draw.

Let’s review the results, artist by artist.

Caroline K.

Score: 25


  • Clearly Caroline K took this to a whole new level by adding the rule “don’t pick your pencil up from the paper” or maybe “don’t look at your drawing at all while you draw.” These are definitely some rules Matthew could benefit from. Or, better, maybe just “don’t put your pencil down on the paper” and “don’t draw at all while you look at your drawing.” Excellent work, Caroline K.
  • These look like they were drawn by an aphasia patient or someone with one eye. Or maybe they were traced in a moving car?
  • Are we playing Surrealist parlour games on Matthew Draws, because this looks a lot like something out of an Exquisite Corpse drawing . . . (I should clarify that I am a fan of the Surrealists, so this is a compliment.)
  • This is mine! I can’t vote for it, that would be cheating. Also because my blind contours aren’t really that great.
  • I gave a bonus point because these appear to be blind contour drawings and done well, not an easy feat.

Thank you, Caroline K, for introducing me to the concept of blind contour drawing. I would attempt it myself, but I fear the result would be horrifying.

Caroline M.

Score: 18

Comments :

  • Amazingly able to capture likenesses with just a few strokes. She should line up a job at Six Flags!
  • Tiny eyes + tiny teeth = big fright

If that job at Six Flags works out, we would like a finder’s fee, Caroline.


Results: 22


  • Wow, “Tiffany”. Don Knotts is basically saying it all with his expression here. Also: I think we should all call Matthew “Tiffany” from now on. He deserves it.
  • “Tiffany”? These look like Matthew’s handiwork.
  • Each one is more disturbingly enthralling than the next . . .
  • Matthew’s! So we can’t vote for this one either. But it would totally get a 4, being, of course, the perfect representation of Matthew Draws.
  • no number of fake names can disguise your genius, Matthew
Dammit, and I thought I was being so sneaky.


Score: 32


  • No fair! Holly knows how to draw!
  • Nice cross-hatching technique

I have to agree with the first commenter, Holly. I’d like to disqualify you. And Caroline K. And anyone else who scores more than 22 points.


Score: 32


  • These actually look like who they’re supposed to look like. Except for Kiefer. He looks like the lead singer of a late 80s alt-rock group. Come to think of it, maybe Kiefer WAS the lead singer of a late 80s alt-rock group. So many actors were, back then.
  • These people look far too normal for Matthew Draws . . .
  • This one rocks!!!
  • While I don’t really think my drawings are any better than anyone else’l I am trashing all of them except mine in the spirit of competitiveness. I have never won anything in my entire life and I feel this might be the opportunity to reverse my lack of good fortune.

Way to go, Lacey! Here at Matthew Draws, we thoroughly applaud bashing the work of your adversaries! Keep up the great work. However, you are also disqualified.


Score: 27


  • Somehow Kiefer got punk rocked. And Don Knotts, who really ought to look MORE ridiculous than he does in real life, actually looks BETTER than he does in real life.
  • Not soooo bad.
  • Is that Don Knotts dressed up as Elvis for Halloween?
I think it’s hilarious how all you voters are pretending that all these wanna be Matthew Draws-ers are better draw-ers than me. Alice is also disqualified.


Score: 23


  • OMG Don Knotts is priceless. Michelle and Cameron are actually identifiable. Kiefer’s hand was handled quite well, though he looks more like that guy who everyone thinks is hot but totally isn’t, um… oh, Channing Tatum. Uck.
  • This is other mine! (Because Mike is mine) So I can’t vote on it either. Also, we’re doing this together, as we always do, so you can count our votes twice.

It seems that Caroline K’s love connection is responsible for these drawings, which, implausibly, scored higher than mine as well. Mike = disqualified.


Score: 23


  • Sorry, Ryan. That hand is OUT OF HAND. Though, Don Knotts and Michelle are seriously Mad Magazine material.
  • Keifer’s got quite a long digit working there.

Dammit, people. Dammit. Ryan, you are disqualified.

Hmm…scanning the results, it seems the only non-Matthew contestant who hasn’t been disqualified is Caroline M. I am tempted to award her the prize, but fear the scalding retribution of all you sticklers. So, scanning the results again, I see we have a tie. A TIE!

Both Holly and Lacey scored a 32.

So, what are we to do?

It seems we’ll have to have a runoff.

Holly and Lacey, I challenge you to draw to the death. Your subject, Uma Thurman.

Please send your drawings of Uma to me by next Wednesday, November 5 so that a jury of your peers can determine the champion.

Moving on, then, to the bonus questions.

Now for the gut check. Which one of the above is really Matthew drawing under a pseudonym?

  • From this group? Alice… but I thought “Tiffany” was definitely Matthew.
  • Tiffany!
  • I just can’t tell.
  • Matthew = Tiffany
  • Tiffany
  • Tiffany!
  • the set by Tiffany
I contend that it is good to have a personal style for which one is known and revered.

Setting aside for a second that no one draws quite as magnificently as Matthew, which of the above comes in a distant second? And, what features of his/her drawing style do you most admire? 

  • I like all of Keifer Sutherland’s hair.
  • Alice did a really nice job with her drawings. I like her strong confident linework. :)
  • Holly has some magic going on
  • Kudos to all seven brave souls.
  • The first group. I like how Caroline K was able to capture them with so few lines.
  • Mike made some interesting choices. Cameron’s neck emerging from a distant field of winter wheat, for example. Don Knotts as a slightly doughy, somewhat worried man with starlet lips. Michelle’s attempt at being gracious while looking askance at, well, whoever it is today who’s insulting her for no apparent reason. And the death stare of Kiefer. Though the likeness isn’t really there, Mike has definitely captured the essence.
  • We’re going to go with Lacey’s, because we think it’s the best attempt of someone who appears to be in the non-skilled drawer category. Holly’s is really really good, but she seems to have had some background with drawing already. (And emliy, the cat, walked over to the keyboard to put in her two cents: s34. Not sure what she means, or who she’s voting for, but she’s giving them a lot of points.)
It cheers me to read these kind words from readers about other readers’ drawings. Which proves my general point that Matthew Draws is not really about drawing at all but about drawing people together. Perhaps we should change the name to Matthew Draws People Together? Doesn’t quite have the same ring to it.
Tune in next friday for the cage match between Holly and Lacey. If you are lucky, I might even throw my own Uma into the ring.
Yes, I think I will.





1 Comment

  1. Jenny

    Why thank you Matthew. I myself was composing various suicide notes, but your comment has brought me full circle and now I am writing a self-help novel.


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